There’s no ‘I’ in Mummy

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I must apologise for a quiet week in the blogging world. It had been a busy week. Amelia had her Auntie come to stay and play, and mummy left her for a whole seven or so hours. This had never been done before, and there was a lot of fear since she became fussy over having milk from a bottle. I needn’t have worried and I suspect the day was more traumatic for me than her. I came home\e to find her having a great time! We had a lovely day all together on Wednesday, and even stayed out later than usual, with Amelia having her dinner out too. Daddy was away on a course for the night so it had been a very girly affair. Daddy, Amelia and I were going to be going away on the Friday so I had spent some time getting everything ready to pack on Thursday morning. I appreciate that this really was a bit last minute. My sister confirmed this with the look she gave me when I told her I hadn’t packed yet. She’s right, and I will learn from this error…hopefully. All was going well (busy, but well) until Thursday afternoon. I realised that I had left home without my coat and it was a wet, cool day. As we drove in the car I suddenly felt really shivery and cold. Though I seemed to be the only one feeling like this. Clearly it was down to having just one cup of tea several hours earlier. Even the husband thought it was that simple. He made me a double strength tea, with a sugar in for good measure. But it didn’t work. The sore throat I’d woken with, and believed was just due to catching too many flies overnight, was the start of a cold. Not ideal. I hadn’t packed. The husband could see the situation arising and took matters into his own hands. He forced us to pack the big pile of stuff into a bag.

The next day I woke still feeling ill, and with an even sorer throat. At this point in the past I would have shut down and gone in to all but essential behaviour mode. But Amelia woke at her usual time, and Daddy had to get to work earlier than usual. I had to suck it up and get on with the day…at 7am. As I slowly walked to the kitchen in a way that might be likened to what Amelia might look like when she takes her first steps I felt awful. The only thing I would most like to do is get back in bed, pull the duvet right up and sleep for the rest of the day, with someone bringing me cups of tea on a regular basis. However, I was sat at the kitchen table feeling exceptionally sorry for myself, with Amelia looking at me with eyes that said ‘Please can I have some porridge?’ And so the day progressed. We visited Grandpa over lunch, where Amelia decided she didn’t want to make having a nap an easy process. She got grumpy, and I got more tired. Grandpa noticed a bit of muck in one of her eyes. It didn’t look much. Anyway she finally fell asleep, as did I. I’m pretty sure Grandpa was thinking we were not the best company ever!

On our return home I knew we had the other set of Grandparents popping by. I had thought it would be a good time to put the last bits together – the nappy bag, etc. However, I didn’t realise just how rotten I felt. So I did this by sitting down every 5 minutes or so.  We finally got on the road at Amelia’s bedtime, as we try to do when we have to go somewhere in the evening. By the time we arrived at our hotel, Amelia had woken and was grumpy. Her eyes looked sticky. She was not happy and it was hard to get her to sleep. I had fallen asleep early too. Then just before midnight we were rudely awoken by her cries. I could barely function. Daddy tried his best but she was screaming and screaming. Even breastfeeding wouldn’t settle her, which could only indicate illness. Normally the breast calms her down easily. So we dosed her with medicine. She woke again in the morning extremely upset again. I knew it was going to be a difficult day. I could barely eat, and walking was even taking its toll. With us both dosed up on Paracetamol for the next 48hours we were in a sorry state. I can only apologise to anyone in the neighbouring hotel room. But luckily my cold is now on the way out and her eyes are getting better. Neither of us are requiring medicine to make it through the day.

These last few days have been an eye-opener (pardon the pun!). I wouldn’t say that I am a wimp where illness is concerned but being unwell and having to be ‘on-call’ for Amelia 24/7 was tough. Especially since she was ill too. It really solidified the point that I am living primarily to care for someone else at the moment. I have no problem with this, but I can safely say that anyone out there living as a single parent, or with a long-term condition is doing an amazing job. I am truly grateful to have had the husband around, and for it to have been a few days only. The husband was in fact a great help – looking after Amelia, dragging me through the weekend, and allowing me to have a pity party at times. I don’t look forward to the winter, and the prospect or more times like this!